The importance and significance in this goofy recollection for me is this...My Mama typically NEVER did my homework for me. Oh, how I wanted her help many times. It would have made my life easier. She always told me to figure it out for myself. I hated this sentence..."That teacher gave that homework to you, not me." ugh!!! How infuriating! I wanted to throw a fit. No matter what, she never budged. In the end, even though I doubted myself and cried that something was too hard, I always accomplished my work on my own merit. Good or bad grade, the grade was mine. Therefore, the triumph or hard lesson learned was mine to claim as well. But, on the day that I copped out and had my Mama create that story for me, I felt embarrassed and ashamed of myself. I'm telling you that I remember every emotion A-Z, just as if it were yesterday. I realized at that time that I cheated and felt guilty. I knew that story was obviously above my head and I could not and did not want to take undeserved credit. I felt ashamed of myself for lack of preparation. Procrastination has been a huge stumbling block for success my entire life. But, above all the afore mentioned acknowledged lessons, I regret the fact that I succumbed to the idea that I did not have the ability to imagine and create a story. When I allowed myself to become convinced that I had no imagination, there were lifelong, self imposed limitations and lack of confidence. Looking back, I wish I would have just taken a zero on that stupid assignment so that I would have been free. Because, the truth is, I believe that I have a great imagination for a story. I love telling stories and recalling the gamut of dramatic and funny, ridiculous, sad, triumphant, disappointing, insignificant, profound, memorable moments of life.
Friday, April 2, 2010
*Posted by greenelbows1 z9--so LA
Isn't it amazing how the sweet, sweet smell of a simple little flower can bring you back and make you feel so nostalgic? I can relate because I love going back to yesteryear in my heart, mind and spirit. What takes you back to a special time? You should take time to breathe deeply in remembrance of those special memories. I think it is very good to savor the moment an allow yourself to go back to a magical place of comfort and joy.